tired...tired..tired...i need a break....i need something to cheer me up.....

was browsing thru the bouquets of flowers...suddenly remembered the bouquet that nicky send me few yrs back that made me happy like crazy...will anyone buy me a bouquet to make me happy the same way as he did...

seriously my brain is empty now....my heart hurts like nobody's business...

not becoz im a failure in love life....but this time its family...n i guess it hurts pretty much...

if u always read my blog...u would have know my parents might not be the best in the world or the worst in the world...but today...they broke my ...

my brother loan $100 fm me...its not a big sum to all but to me n the rest at hm its a big deal...dad n mum found out abt the issue of this loan of $$ and my brother juz to cover his butt he told my dad he loan $20 fm me...n my dad gave me $20 back for my brother... n he went to tell my mum he only loan $10 fm me... n guess wat my mum told my dad that i BLUFF his $20...u didnt hear wrongly...BLUFF his TWENTY BUCKS.... when i heard that sentences my not becoz i was blame for loaning my brother $$ but becoz i was accused of CHEATING my dad's $20...

to me i know that my brother wanted to get gifts for his gf...thats y i loan him the $$ yet he turn his back on me blaming me for everything..my dad blames me for loaning him $$ my mum accuse me CHEATING my dad's $20... she dun even contribute to the family... i contribute $250 as A STUDENT...yet she working yet giving wat to the family...still dare to accused me when she only listen to my brother..

Paul tell me its time i turn my back to the family...n change my hp n everything...can someone tell me??is it really time for me to do that...im dwn really dwn now...i so want to have the dog that someone is giving me but i juz cant juz coz they dun like dogs...i accept that but y muz they make me feel tat im damn unwanted then treat me damn sweet coz they feel bad....

Sometime is juz too tiring....

I juz cant help but broke dwn in zhi gang's car...

when kor know i cried he let me had my space to let everything out...

in the end was only back home at1+ and i was damn tired....coz was out the whole day...

wanna know y...its juz becoz my started to throw her tantram...making a big fuss becoz of my room n my clothes...its like HALO....u dun even wash my clothes for me...which i dun give a damn...u can wash the whole family's clothes but not mine...You can mop the whole floor but not my room....u can eat the things i buy yet when i eat the things u buy i muz pay u??? does this sound very funny?? but thats my mum...best part my mum picks a "fight" with my dad n there comes my dad calling me n blaming me abt it...i juz dun understand y is it always me...i dun take a fucking cent from them yet in turn in giving them $$ as a student status... but they nv care a little about me...all they care is $$ when im back home its always $$ that they tok abt...anybody care abt my neck n shoulder prob...it seems to worsen that my doc wan to give me a jab to relieve the pain...

im so tired of everything that i so feel like going overseas n hide there n not come back....damn tired of everything...waiting for results is the worst feeling..but everything juz seem to not be the right way...the only thing im happy now is i guess seeing my patients getting well and out of the hospital...and the praises that they wrote in the feedback form...thats the pushing force for me now i guess... and the mad thing that is the more i work in my ward the more i feel like getting married and settling dwn...but who is the one i can depend on to settle dwn with...how many kids will i have...day dreaming i know...but sometimes when u c the parents of my kids in the ward u so feel like being like them...always being there for each other...when wil i find a guy that is like that???

i told myself one more time i will be out of my hse....

Love

Love is a pain in your heart
Love is breathing fast
Love is a headache a mistake
A game of give and take
Love is what you make of it
Sometimes good things come of it
Sometimes turns to shit

Love is a mad thing
Love is a sad thing
Love is a happy thing
When birds Sing.
When bells ring.

Love is a rose waiting for to bloom
Love is nothing and yet every thing
Love is something you will find
So long as you are not looking

Love will strain you drain you
Love will fill you engulf you
Make you smell nice think twice
On the things your going to do

Love is falling into it
Love is falling out of it
It’s a chase a race a dice with fate
It’s a royal flush and all that stuff
That makes a heart race
Love is when you first met
Blends in under your skin

Love is when you carry on
Trough the good times the bad times
Forgiving when you are wronged
Love is music, dancing, romancing
Candles, tables, rings,
It’s a billion stupid things.

Love is holding your first born
Love is dreaming scheming planing
Love is the be all and end all
Love is silence knowing what is thought
When no words are required
Love is a hug a smile a glance
A shoulder to cry on
Love is